I believe that we always know what to do next. For some of us, the answer may be right on the surface, others might have to dig deep for it. I believe that the more we ignore that call from within, the quieter it gets. It may seem impossible to do what your heart is telling you to do.
When I learned about the overturning of Roe v Wade I was in the middle of a work project. At that moment I wanted to detach from my body and sink into a new reality, one where I am not free, where I am not valued. But that was me trying to protect myself, using old ways of coping. Playing dead. If I don't matter, then this doesn't matter.
What we are seeing right now may have us believe that our value is being diminished, but that's just not true. The obstacles to equal rights are mounting, and they are ridiculous. Gerrymandering. Lifelong positions of power. It may seem like we're all doomed.
But I am challenging myself to think differently, to lean into the very thing that they are trying to take from me. I am an animal and, like all living things, I am inherently free. I am free to express my rage at a 9:00 AM meeting. I am free to help others and to cry deep in the night for all of those I cannot. I am free to find moments of joy in the midst of this chaos. I am free to do whatever the next thing is, and right now it is to lean into my hunger, my longing for connection, my instinct to create. I am not thinking about the predator that may or may not come.
I believe that when we lean into the next thing, we can't lose ourselves. So, if you can, don't let yourself ignore it. Don't bury it because it's easier. Follow it, and don't let anyone tell you that you can't. This is how we build resilience. This is how we heal. This is how we create change.
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